i'm free of you FINALLY. no goodbyes, for i will not miss you. i'm thankful that i'm able to take some time in my life right now to focus on what really makes me happy and what i'm most passionate about; bangs & blush, freelance writing and graphic design. this summer's gonna be a great one! suck my peen, cubical!

mcdonalds coffee
fuck tim hortons, mcdonalds coffee is where it's at. not only is it free trade, cheaper and tastes better than most other coffee's but the size difference is insane! the medium coffee at micky dee's is the size of a large at tim hortons. and tim horton's coffee tastes like garbage. whatever, ya'll; haters gon hate. but i like my mick dick's coffee.
getting older
it's my twenty-fifth birthday this upcoming monday, and i'm pretty at peace about it. i mean, i'm nearly twenty five and i look like a sixteen year old. i can't complain. meanwhile, in terms of where i am in my life i'm so satisfied with everything i've accomplished so far and all of the wonderful and awful experiences i've been through because they have truly shaped me into the person i am today and i wouldn't trade that for anything. twenty five is this weird middle of nearly forgetting what it was like to sneak into bars and just on the cusp of about to start hitting on eighteen year old boys. SOON, BRITTNEY. SOON.

kate middleton's mcqueen dress
sara burton, alexander mcqueen's right-hand woman and successor, was chosen to design and create kate middleton's wedding dress for today's insanely huge royal wedding. i didn't really give a flying fuck about it, i haven't even seen any footage really, but i did see photos of kate in the dress and i must say i truly enjoyed it. clean, simple, delicate and glamorous; perfect for a royal wedding or a movie starlet. stay classy.

my uber awesome boyfriend
jesse is the most awesome guy i have ever met and he just so happens to be my main squeeze. the other day he said my new hair colour makes me look like a member of jem. um, best compliment ever? we're getting a new edition to our family this weekend, our well-awaited kitten, who will then be disgustingly spoiled/loved/cuddled by the both of us. i'm ever so lucky to have someone so wonderful in my life.

honey lemon tea
my high school drama teacher (an old, short, probably gay white dude) taught me a lot ... but nothing beats my the honey/lemon tea concoction. stupid how i would've never thought of it/heard of it before, but every time i'm sick i just drink cups and cups of hot water with freshly squeezed lemon and honey and i feel like a million bucks afterwards. i swear on this hot beverage. i'm drinking it now. my, this has been quite a boring friday hasn't it? here, i feel bad. here's something disgusting for your viewing pleasure:


being sick sucks.

and let me tell you why. i'm steering away here, from all of the basic reasons we as humans this day and age hate getting sick. the coughing, sneezing, fever bullshit aside. now, i am a patient woman... but i just don't have time for this crap.

  1. Loosing It  when the fever kicks in, it makes me do and say some really fucking stupid stuff. my dad always tells me this story of when i was about six years old, i busted down his bedroom door at 7 am screaming semi-nude that he had stolen my bag of money (yes, a sack with a dollar-sign on it) and that i demanded him to return it to me or else. well, just now i went to make a cup of tea and misread the expire date "MA" on the milk carton as "march" and spat out a mouth-full of tea on my fridge door. may, brittney. the milk goes BAD IN MAY.
  2. Shit Be Expensive  i ran by my local shoppers drug mart on the way home to grab a box of the split dayquil/nyquil. does anyone else realize how much it fucking cost? oh hey shoppers, you want my first-born too while we're at it? fuck me sideways.
  3. No One Wants To Take Care Of Me  did i do something wrong in a past life or something? because when i'm sick no one wants to fucking take care of me. jesse will make me a cup of tea and pat my head and all, but that's about it. am i that annoying when i'm sick? yeah maybe i look like a witch. maybe i talk in a babies voice. maybe i will keep you up all night weezing like a deflating balloon. WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME.
  4. Day-time TV Blows  have any of you taken a sick day lately? the idea of staying in bed all curled up does make one feel warm and gooey inside just like a marshmallow on a fire pit, but bitch please; next time make sure you hit up the blockbuster ahead of time. it's literally the steven & chris show and family feud (no, not the good one, the one with the hilariously unfunny steve harvey). THAT'S. ABOUT. IT.
  5. Why Do I Feel Like I Had Multiple Surgeries All Over My Body? i can take the sniffles, coughing and tiredness but it's when whatever illness i'm suffering through makes my entire body shudder in pain with every movement i make ... i fucking lose it. picking up a cup? pain. walking to the bathroom? pain. shampooing my hair? PAIN. wanting to cry when i cross my legs? EMOTIONAL PAIN.
  6. I Feel Really Shitty Keeping My Boyfriend Awake yeah, not getting a full night's sleep because of a continuous chest cough really blows for me. i feel even worse realizing that i'm preventing my poor boyfriend from getting a good sleep, too. the guilt of sickness. which brings me to...
  7. Guilt  i read an article last week somewhere that mentioned that mostly only women feel guilty about missing work due to illness. they put it as the age-old natural gift of feeling responsible for other people, mothering as we call it, that women have. sure, i feel really bad calling in sick. it has nothing to do with mothering. it's called being a goddamn workaholic.
  8. All I Can Do Is Wait god, just... just wake me up when it's over. fuck.
the hell with it


the thursday edition

tomorrow is good friday, and the whole city gets a day off. where i'd love to provide all you lovely shirksters with some good ol' things i love friday tomorrow, i'd much rather take a day off just like everyone else. thus, here we are, doing the weekly things i love fridays one day early. who caaayahs.

that thing you do
man i don't know why, but i've been super jonsing to watch/rent this movie lately. used to be, and still is one of my favorites. liv tyler... what the hell ever happened to that chick, anyways? POINT IS, this is a mega guilty pleasure of mine. tom everet scott is a total fucking "you're-so-hot-i-could-kill-myself" babe, too. 

the b sharps
i'm a stupidly obsessed simpsons fan, and i always remember the b-sharps episode being one of my favorites. "baby on board". classic. not to mention the dozens of beatles references, and even a little guest appearance by my favorite beatle george himself!

no one should ever be allowed to use this at work. i, on the other hand, couldn't resist.


she does the city
not only is this one of my favorite blogs, toronto-based or not, but all of the ladies who run the joint have to be some of the nicest girls going right now. also, they've had a big hand in helping out bangs & blush with getting their parties off the ground since we first came together nearly a year ago. thank you ladies for everything, keep up the great work and SISTERS ARE DOING IT FOR THEMSELVES.

today's song of the day

being a graphic designer
i love being creative, and i love building something from the ground up in terms of creating a look and feel to a company, event or identity. doing posters for my friends is also a lot of fun and quite rewarding. in terms of shirk, bangs & blush, my old band and everything else i've ever been a part of, doing my own design work and not having to pay a single cent for it is also a huge, juicy cherry on top. i plan on crankin' out some crazy-ass shit this summer.



fred & friends is one of the most innovative, creative and genius companies out there right now with a team behind them cranking out some of the most amazing inventions available for every day life use. i first came across fred and friends a few years ago in a specialty store, and after grazing their website constantly and realizing i have never featured their products on shirk before, well golly i just had to jump right to it. and did i mention that most of their gadgets are completely recyclable and super affordable? hey... if you're looking for something to get me for my birthday... cough.

jesse wants these.
better off red.
just in time for spring, i've decided to give my mane a little re-vamp. it's been a really long time, almost a year, since i messed around with my hair colour. i always go back to black, but it's nice to break it up a little here and there and do something fresh (just for my sanity). and obviously, dying is always the best bet in terms of easy and safe changes to make to your hair when you're sorta bored with it; lord knows i've come this far with growing my hair out so i'm not taking a pair of scissors to this bitch unless i have to. so i think i'm gonna go back to red. i enjoyed the red. it brought a boost of colour to my skin and over-all appearance, and with all of the black clothes i be rockin' it'd be nice to not look like i'm on my way to a funeral every day.


when spring rolls around, lots of rain is a given. sometimes rain comes on your day off, like today. which sucks. or, you can embrace it! when you're out there without an umbrella, and your hair is looking the best it's looked in weeks, there is a major suckage of balls. or instead you can do what shirk does and follow through with these fun rainy day activities! 

pick up that book you've been neglecting
i was so excited to get a copy of keith richard's "life" for christmas and still haven't even finished it. after just finishing tina fey's book "bossypants" yesterday, i'm on a fucking roll here and nearly forgot how satisfying it is to look forward to reading and finishing a book. me thinks i'm going to curl up with it right now, which goes very well with my next activity...

make a lot of tea/coffee then drink the fuck out of it
the weekends seem to be the only time i consume hot beverages that i haven't bought from a coffee shop/cafe. something about the sound of my kettle whistling from my kitchen just rings in "weekend" to me. i have a small kettle collection, and i love to make a few batches of tea or coffee (preferably green, chai, mint or orange pekoe), fill them up and put little tea cosy's on them. then i bring out my best tea cups and sit in front of the mac to work alongside my own little tea party. better yet, invite over your hung over friends/neighbors for a little afternoon tea party and watch the rain clouds roll by.

clean out your closet
this is something i haven't done for a while; i just haven't had any time! not to mention that i haven't even had time to move in my dresser from my garage since i fucking moved into this place (that was the first of december, by the way. i know, i'm terrible). but it's about time i sort through it all and decide what i want to keep, give to charity or pass down to my younger lady cousins. and since the april shirk magazine's clothing challenge is half way through i've realized the stuff i own that i actually want to keep. look forward to shirk magazine's online store some time soon; i think i'll give away some of my goodies! here are shirk magazine's must-keeps for when you do finally clean out your closet:

  1. stripes and polka dots - never get rid of these items. they are timeless, classic and can be easily integrated into any outfit.
  2. throw out anything that you have put aside for more than a year to get fixed; this includes cheap shoes, rips and stains. you'll probably never get around to it.
  3. anything you spent more than $100 but don't wear anymore, save it. store it somewhere safe; you never know if it'll come back with a vengeance in your near fashion future and fuck, it cost you a pretty penny!
  4. look for items that with an easy modification could become something new and fabulous; make shorts out of those old jeans, try rolling up them up in cuffs or maybe add some vintage broaches to an old jacket/shirt to give it a new breath of life!
  5. keep plain shirts/tops for layering purposes. layering is always an amazing use of your clothes and a trendy look at the moment; mix your sheers, cottons and wools to create a look that's individual!

make a short film
in this day and age, quite a tech age, anyone is able to make a film. most of our computers have cams on it, as well as our friggen ipods and cell phones too. why not film a goofy movie with your friend, or capture your pet being an idiot. it's always fun to have your own youtube account where you can go back and visit your precious filmed memories. lord knows i've made an ass out of myself on the internet, just like this ridiculous short of me showing my extensive sunglass collection two years ago. ugh god, it's like yearbook photos but much, much worse. but it's fun!

rearrange your furniture
sometimes we all feel like we need therapy. or a change. something new. instead of shaving off all of your hair, why don't you try rearranging your furniture? i find if i do this every three/four months it keeps me a little more sane after having to be the hermit that i am. this could also coincide with cleaning out your closet in a way; clean out your living space and get rid of all the crap you don't need anymore. make things more pleasant to your eye and keep things tidy and dusted. colour arrange your books even; i love the way that looks on a book shelf. go out and buy some fresh flowers, that always livens up a room. open up the windows, let some fresh rain air in. old furniture looking ratty? give it a new lick of paint! as a matter of fact, i plan on going to get myself some new sheets this afternoon for a fresh new look for jesse and i's bed. see? it can all be so simple.

listen to those albums you never got around to
sometimes i find it hard to keep up with all the latest releases these days. i sound like an old lady, but there's constantly so much new music being released that i don't know how to keep up. i usually don't buy an album unless i've heard from multiple trusted sources that it's a great listen. for example, i was lagging a bit when the new beady eye record was released, but i finally got around to it when i gave the whole thing a listen last weekend while doing the dishes. turn it up and blast the hell out of it while you're doing your household chores! and as someone who picks up a lot of records at garage sales, vintage stores and antique markets, i tend to buy them because i has one or two songs i know/like because they're so cheap. but i love to throw those on and discover new music, because hey, it's raining outside. you've got no where to be.

you can take this as making cookies or getting really stoned, but i'd rather do both! i am no where near a betty crocker type; i leave that to my friend and bangs & blush door girl holly. but what better time to try to better your craft as a baker than on a rainy saturday? think of all of your favorite treats to eat and start looking up recipes online! or, if you're lucky, call your mom/grandma/aunts for that delicious secret recipe that's been in the family for years. it's good to learn this stuff so you can pass it onto your kids one day! here's a link for, apparently, the best fifty cookie recipes on the internet. try it out and let me know how that goes for you. i also hear through the grapevine that bakingbites.com is one of the best baking blogs you can find today. go forth, young bakers!
can someone get me these for my birthday?
go for lunch with your mom/dad/sibling
they miss you. 

dance away the rain blues with bangs & blush
shake rattle and roll at clintons tonight! no other party compares; meet us on the dance floor, bring your girls, guys and gays and forget all about it to the sweet sounds of sixties soul and rock & roll! drink, dance, get messy ya'll.